After much contemplation, introspection, and review of the comments I received on my previous post, I have decided to accept Neil's challenge to write something of substance.
Now, since it really is not me to write politically, I have chosen another subject which I deem as apropos, educational, and psychologically relevant.
I have to give a hat tip to my own mother, who just this morning sent me this provocative article.
It comes via the year 1955, which is, coincidentally, the exact year I first made my appearance on this earth. (Well, Shirley Maclaine might not agree, but let's just go with it).
Although I will be speaking on a personal level, I know that my conclusions may be generalized and thus, beneficial to the "world" marital population. So, let me begin:
Apparently, I have provided well for my husband in this particular area. I have been known to not only make advance reservations, but I have plenty of turkey sandwich materials at the ready, at all times.
Why, resting is first on my list! I think that a day of soap operas and Oprah, eating icecream and dousing myself in J.LO perfume, is a definite fulfillment of this suggestion.
(Be a little gay...hmmmm) Does offering to have Stacy Keebler of "Dancing with the Stars" join our evening festivities (wink wink) suffice? I think... probably.
Don't let cockroaches, ants, or various other sundry bugs that seem to gather from hiding old icecream bar and bon-bon wrappers underneath furniture, be a deterent to tidying up the house.
Cheering your husband on as he accidentally takes a little ride on a skateboard left out in the hallway bodes well for this particular point.
Yes, a fire is important in aiding in the cleanup of chocolate bars eaten throughout one's day.
I have found, through the years, that tying my children up after a short beating has worked well in keeping them attentive and quiet around their daddy's arrival home from work.
Point 8 and 9:
Wrapping myself in nothing but Saran Wrap has notoriously worked well as a warm welcome, (except for the time he brought his partner home for dinner).
Point 10, 11, 12, 13:
I will attempt to tie these 4 together for sake of time and space.
I never greet him with complaints of the day...I always let him speak first. He says "hello", then I speak. I gently and slowly reveal how my day sucked, what broke, which kid drove me crazy, and which celebrity died that day. But all of this is done after he has had a chance to set down his keys and give me a kiss.
Why of course, I have never complained if he stays out all night. I silently change the locks.
Point 15 and 16:
After screaming at him in a gentle voice for 15 minutes about the ills of the day...while he makes his turkey sandwich...I invite my husband to lay comfortably on the floor, while I control the t.v. remote...I don't want him to exert any precious energy after a hard day at work.
I make all the decisions in our marriage, because I understand that my place is to NEVER question my husband.
I can only conclude from the preceeding answers, that I am, indeed, a good wife. I know and understand my place.
I only hope that I have achieved my goal of writing a post that will contribute to the psychological well-being of married couples everywhere.
I only hope, that today, my blog, like others I faithfully read, will contribute something of substance...finally.
If I can achieve this, then I will know this blog has not been written in vain. ( or is it vein?)