Tuesday, March 14, 2006

My night as a Stripper

Got your attention, didn't I

It was about 22 years ago, and "the girls" and I decided it was time for a weekend trip to Palm Springs. I was already seriously dating Mr. Cruisin, but you know, there's nothing like quality time with the ladies.

Bear with me, because it's hard to remember every detail. But what I do remember, is a night I will never forget.

Being in our late 20's, all of us working hard to support ourselves, none of us could afford to stay at a Ritz Carlton. So we took the practical route and registered for one room at something comparable to a Best Western. We figured, if we all crammed into one room...we'd save loads of money. (More to spend on food, of course).

So we checked into our "luxury" suite to unpack, get our bathing suits on and get to the pool and sun as fast as we could. While checking out our weekend digs, we noticed the floor to ceiling window in the front of the room.

This window not only had drapes that could be drawn, but a layer of mylar covering as well. Mylar window coverings really took off in the 60's as a way to block out heat. Perfect for Palm Springs.

Here's how it works...if you are looking at the window from the outside...it looks like a mirror. From the inside of the room, it looks like a regular window and you can see to the outside.

In other words, you did not need to draw the drapes, because from the outside, it was as if you were looking at a giant mirror.

The room was anything but great, but it was cheap, had a couple of beds, a shower and toilet. What else did 5 swingin' gals need? We were ON VACATION!!!

While sunning by the pool, I began to feel sick. Lucky me...finally on vacation, and I'm going to spend it being nauseated. GREAT.

When you're in your 20's and single, the whole goal of a trip to Palm Springs is to get a tan, eat, drink, and look for men (not me of course, I was spoken for).

So, after a full day of sun, it was time to go in and start getting ready for an evening of "women on the prowl". (okay, it wasn't really that bad...but what's a story without spicing it just a little).

As I sprawled out on the bed, continuing to feel sick...all of the other ladies were busy readying themselves for the evening. One by one, showers were taken, and as most women will do after a shower, they were in underwear putting on make-up, lotion, blow-drying hair...you know, all the normal things women do after taking a shower.

Talking and laughing ensued while getting "beautified" and trying to decide where to dine and spend the evening. I was laying there moaning and wishing my queasy stomach would just disappear.

As the the ladies continued to get ready, the phone in our room began ringing. It was a woman calling to tell us that we might want to pull the drapes shut.

Why, you might be asking? I'll tell you why. What we forgot to take note of was this...

Mylar, while during the day acts as a mirror on the outside...at night it works in reverse.

While we were now looking at a mirror on the inside, what we failed to realize was, that the mirror on the "outside" had now become a window.

The woman was calling to tell us we had, um, an audience.

We opened the door, only to discover about 20 people sitting in lawn chairs, just watching and laughing and applauding.

HOLY CRAP!!!

As you can imagine, humiliation set in, BIG TIME! My first (and admittedly selfish) thought at that moment was, "boy, am I glad I'm sick and laying here fully clothed"!).

My selfish thoughts, very quickly turned to my friends and the shear humiliation they were feeling. We didn't know whether to laugh or cry, because let's face it...at first it seemed kind of funny. I mean, really, how could we have been so dense as to not realize that the mylar reversed at night?

But any laughter quickly turned into this very icky feeling of disgust and fear. All of these people had seen my friends in their underwear. YUCK! I was teetering on feeling guilty for not being one of the girls sauntering around in my delicates too.

At that point, we all looked at eachother and agreed...we had to get out of there as quickly as possible. (The really awful part, was that there had been women sitting out there in the "audience", who didn't seem to feel an allegiance to "the sisterhood" and call us on the phone a lot sooner, to let us know of the free show we had been putting on).

We packed and ran out of there in record time. We couldn't get out of there fast enough.

And so began our trip back home. Vacation...gone. Rest and relaxation...gone.
HUMILIATION...here to stay, big time.

Of course, we hadn't eaten dinner yet, so on our way home we stopped to eat at Marie Calendar's. We all needed some nice warm soup to calm down our nerves. We ate, and talked, and laughed, and cried...knowing this would be a vacation we'd never forget.

I decided I had better call Mr. Cruisin to let him know I was on my way home...that our vacation had been brought to an abrupt halt.

I picked up a pay phone (yep, no cells in those days), and when I heard Mr. Cruisin's voice, I broke down in tears...

"Mr. Cruisin...you won't believe what happened to us tonight..."

16 comments:

Sweettooth120 said...

No videotape either? Just imagine the royalities from the Girls Gone Wild videos.

Something like that happen to my husband and I while we were camping on the beach on the Outer Banks. We were fooling around in our tent, not really dressed, and because it was during the day and it was also very hot, we had the flap to our pup tent open but we had the screen closed we figured noone could really see in. Suddenly my hubby looks up and see this old man, squatting, just taking in the show. Ok. It's not as bad as an audience of 20, but for my very shy husband, it was enough for him to never want to try that again.

cruisin-mom said...

S.T.: Damn! We WERE the original Girls Gone Wild. Who knew?! I think your story tops mine! LOL

Jake said...

Randi, I'm doing the math. This incident happened in 1984, no? And "Body Double," a movie about a guy who's whole heap of trouble begins with some peeping tom incidents, also came out in 1984. I think Robert owes you for something more than the babka!

Irina Tsukerman said...

Good thing you warned us, just in case any of us wind up staying in one of those places!

PsychoToddler said...

That body double was a terrible movie. Who's Robert?

Neil said...

That is so funny. Now do you remember where this motel is, because I was thinking of making a trip out there to hang out at the pool at sundown?

Ezzie said...

LOL. We usually keep our blinds closed in our first-floor apartment for that reason, especially when there are guests. Once, Serach and I walked a couple of guests home, and came back a while later. As we got back to the courtyard, I realized I could see both our guests through the window. When we walked in, we told them about the blinds - one remarked, "Well, I guess I just gave a lot of your neighbors a show then..."

Wendy said...

Hysterical!

New Years Eve 1992...in my soon-to-be hub's kitchen (on the table, if I recall properly)... just to see out the window that the neighbors (along with guests) with champagne were on their back deck across the way watching, pointing....

I'd blocked it out but it's rushing back in!

cruisin-mom said...

Jake: Maybe your comment will actually get Robert to finally comment on my blog!!! (other than that, my lips are sealed)

Irina: I like to use this blog for important public service announcements.

P.T. Hmmmm, try googling him

Neil: I'll get the exact address for you. I know, you just want to do some research for your blog.

Ezzie: Your guests sound a bit kinky!!!

Wendy: Oy, too much information!!! (but, glad I could jog your memory)

Jack's Shack said...

That is pretty darn funny.

PsychoToddler said...

Kidding.

cruisin-mom said...

P.T.: Me too!!! ;)
(don't you know by now we have the same depraved sense of humor?!)

torontopearl said...

You must be the life of any party when you tell this story! Oh, wait, you don't have to tell this story, or any story, to be the life of the party.

cruisin-mom said...

T.P.: that's me, the "go-to" person for entertainment!

Head over heel said...

Sorry but I was laughing tears that's a great story!!!!I had the story pictured in my mind....

cruisin-mom said...

H.O.H.: Glad I could provide laughter and tears! Believe me, I still have the story pictured in my head too!