Thursday, December 14, 2006

Ramblings (or, how not to end up like Brad and Jen)

Well, I just picked myself up off the floor where I was eating handfuls of jelly bellies.

Sounds weird, you say? Well, let me explain.

Our annual Hanukah party is this Saturday night. You can read about last year's party here. A staple of the party is a big jar of jelly bellies from Costco. I bought that jar today, and of course had to hide it from the vultures, I mean my family, so there would be at least a few left for the party.

Well, the problem with hiding things from others, is this: you know where you hid it!

Now, if you have followed this blog for awhile, you know of my unnatural love for jelly belly's.

So, about an hour after hiding them, I remembered and thought to myself: "Eureka, I have jelly bellies in the house"!!! So, what's a girl to do? What else...find those little buggers and start shoveling them in.

It just so happens I hid them in a lower cabinet in the laundry room. So, I bent down to grab them, open the jar, and lo and behold I fell right on my a*#.

And there I sat. With the jar. I opened the jar. I ate. Lot's and lot's of jelly bellies. Ummm, good.

I thought to myself, well, this is certainly "blogworthy". Actually, it was "pull out the video camera, she's sitting alone on the floor shoveling j.b.'s into her mouth as fast as she can" worthy.

That was rambling number one.

Here's rambling number two.

Last week while attending my work's holiday lunch, a 30 year old volunteer for the center I work for, asked if I had a boyfriend.

See, apparently she thought I was a widow, and that I should be fixed up with somebody.
After contemplating how to answer for a moment or two, I thought that perhaps I should tell the truth...that I had been happily married for 21 years. But I asked her if she knew any men around the age of 50 to fix up with my friend.

Her reply:

Oh, I don't know anyone THAT old!

I immediately asked, " old was this guy you wanted to fix me up with"?
She said, "well I'm, someone around that age".

Now may I say, this was getting more intriguing by the minute. I mean...Mr. Cruisin probably wouldn't notice that I was out on a date with a much younger man. He'd probably be asleep on the couch, or repairing bushings, or refurbishing the entire house or something.

So, why not go out on a date with a much younger man? I could be out and back before Mr. Cruisin finished napping.

But then I thought about Brad and Jen...afterall, he just went out to make a little movie, and we all know what happened there.

Goodness knows, that's not what I one could make me laugh like Mr. Cruisin.

But hey, a girl can fantasize for a moment right? Afterall, how often does a flashing 51 year old get asked to be fixed up with someone in their 30's?

Hmmmm?...tell me...I'm waiting...............

(happy hanukah everyone)


Ezzie said...

So, I bent down to grab them, open the jar, and lo and behold I fell right on my a*#.

And there I sat. With the jar. I opened the jar. I ate. Lot's and lot's of jelly bellies. Ummm, good.

I laughed a lot at that one! (Sorry.)

...and right after you dedicate a post to Mr. C... hmph. Naughty CM. ;)

Leann said...

well dear I married my friend 3 years ago.he is 41 and Iam 57.well it was a good Idia at the time but I found out that too much of a good thing can kill a old lady get my drift?and besides its too hard to house train puppys.stick with the one you have and you will be much better off.

Leann said...

brad is a bone head.sooner or later the black widow will kill him off any way.she will tire of him and he will be dumped.and it will be his own fault.jen is the blessed one she will find agood man now if she is smart.

torontopearl said...

Listen, CM, when you've got it, you've GOT IT! (hmmm, that works both ways doesn't it? You've got Mr. CM, but then again, you've also got that panache, that je ne sais quoi that makes you capable of being set up with much younger men.

Great ego booster, huh?

Save some JB's for moi, 'kay?

Doctor Bean said...

Happy Hanuka!

Jack's Shack said...

Ah, now I know who it was who cut me off in the parking lot and then made the mad dash for the beans.

I was ambling up the way past Staples and over to the Costco side when this lady in a large SUV flew right by me.

As she passed by I noticed that she kept fanning herself with a copy of the program from the Season Finale of Dancing With the Stars.

dan said...

Bubbie and Zadie say CM, you are a born humorist and a very good writer. Write on! and happy Hannukah spelled ten thosuand ways...

Bubbie & ZAdie, forever young!

who's counting?

kasamba said...

_ Jelly Bellys- yum!
I would eat them from the floor
I would eat them under a door
I would eat them in my house
I'd grab them back from a mouse
I'm with you CM!!!

Anonymous said...

you know when you have been living in israel for too long? when you never heard of helly bellies!!! oy...we got jelly time i get to the states they will be on my list along with the peanut butter m&ms...and a corned beef sandwich...ahhhh the things that dreams are made of...chag sameach

cruisin-mom said...

Ezzie: Mr. Cruisin was laughing his a#* off reading that too!

Leann: Hmmmm...we'll see if your prediction about brangelina is correct!

T.P.: well, maybe an ego booster, or maybe she just has a friend she's trying to dump on someone. :)

Doc: Thanks, same to you and yours (glad you stopped by)

Jack:, if I drove a big SUV, I'd say...yep that's me. (but, alas, I don't)

Dan: thanks for the compliment...Bubbie and Zaida are wonderful!

kasamba: LOVE it...and, yep...I would eat them from the floor (anyone out there know the 3 second rule?)

MBM: I can't believe they don't have j.b's in Israel. By the way, they were Ronald Reagans favorite. And, I hate to tell you, we had Corned beef last night.

Val said...

Stay with Mr C.... he would TOO notice... and well, you made laugh with the other stuff you wrote! :)

cruisin-mom said...

Val: I will take your advice and continue to hang out with Mr. C...glad I made you laugh :)