Monday, November 06, 2006

Area 51


I can't believe it.

I'm eating my ice cream and watching Desperate Housewives, and on comes a commercial for Christmas.

And then another.

HUH?

Is it my imagination, or does the whole advertising thing get started earlier and earlier every year?

I just finished stuffing all of the left over Halloween candy down my throat...the Thanksgiving turkey hasn't even been captured, and already the Christmas ads are here.

In these commercials, it's snowing.

Of course, here in L.A. it's 90 degrees.

And if I don't buy Hanuka invitations soon, the only available invitations and decorations will be for St. Patrick's day.

Do you think a Shamrock can pass for a Star of David?

In the midst of all of this...I'm turning choke, cough, choke 51 in less than two weeks.

Things are spinning and spiraling faster and faster each year.

Unfortunately this includes my body parts. And they aren't spinning and spiraling in an upward motion if you get my drift. Well, that's a post for another time.

Anyhoo, back to the holidays. And my birthday. And trying to figure out how it is that I am turning 51, which somehow feels even more surreal than turning 50.

When you turn 50, even though it's old (don't believe 'em when they tell you that 50 is the new 30), people make a big deal out of it. After all, it's a milestone right?

But 51, well...let's just say everyone "fuh-gets" about it.

Now, not only are you old...but no one really cares.

So this year I took the bull by the horns and decided I would go see my look-a-like in a one woman show the night of my birthday. I'm draggin' Mr. Cruisin along.

Poor guy, never in his life did he dream he'd be sleeping with a 51 year old broad.

But that's how life goes...one minute your a hot 25 year old babe...the next minute you're hot alright, but it comes in flashes.

So, while scarfing up the rest of the Halloween candy, and preparing to capture my Turkey, I will try to enjoy these next two weeks and bask in the glory of being a 50 year old.

19 comments:

Dirk_Star said...

So cmon, did you see it coming when skank got shot and died? WOW! Smokin show!

I enjoy being fifty-two... Life is just so good at any age!

http://jestersrap.blogspot.com/

torontopearl said...

I've also been waiting to hear the first Christmas music on the radio or see the decorations around. Thank G-d I saw someone tooling around town yesterday with the top down on his car ... maybe there's still hope that Christmas ISN'T just around the corner.

As for your upcoming 51st...? Just grin and BARE IT. (Yes, that was an intentional spelling.)Gravity has its own way of doing things, whether you like it or not. So, why not just go with the flow!

Val said...

Hysterical and great writing... and selfishly, I'm just happy to read about others who, though by only a couple of years, are older than me!! ;-P

Enjoy the next 2 weeks! :)

Wishing I was a said...

I'm with Val! So nice to bask in the knowledge that you are older than me! Quit stuffing the icecream in, and maybe the gravity won't push everything down so fast! jk....

Ezer K'negdo said...

I work in a high-end housewares retail establishment. Thanksgiving began October 1, and we have had Christmas candy and tchotchkes out for 2 weeks already. Seriously. The day after Thanksgiving, our "holiday" CD goes on.

***EK gagging***

The only up side is that ironically, much of the "holiday" items are kosher.

Happy early birthday!

Mia said...

Christmas has started in Sweden as well, but at least we have some snow which is giving some sort of christmassy feeling....

Funny I felt the same with my 32 birthday as you do with your 51. I think the round birthdays are so highly celebrated that you have a lot of time to adjust that the day arrives. but the inbetween birthday are just all of the sudden here and are shocking.

I didn´t really realize how old I got last week until a friend wrote me an email: all the best to your 32nd birthday! I thought I needed new glasses, she can´t mean me!!!

I know you are a few years older than me, but being over thirty is sooooo weird to me!!!

Do you watch "Brothers & Sisters" ? Love that show - it´s my absolute favorite of the season!!

Happy early Birthday!!!

Anonymous said...

It never feels like Christmas down here in FL either. And Happy early Birthday to you! The alternative to NOT celebrating a birthday is even more difficult to take than turning a year older in my book!

cheated are the clouds said...

What!!! forget the christmas thing, It's how hot in LA, 90 Degrees, Oh man I am so living in the wrong part of this earth,Funny you mentioned Mr cruisin never thinking he would be sleeping with a 51 year old, well I never thought my wife would ever sleep with an old, over weight, balding, drewwling, guy either, life you have to take or live with it, I bet your still the hottest 51 year old Mr Cruisin knows, funny stuff

Shira Salamone said...

At 57, I can tell me all about being "hot stuff." :) I haven't been able to wear a sweater indoors for years!

Mazal tov on your upcoming birthday. Have a blast (preferably of cold air to cure the hot flashes :) ).

Sweettooth120 said...

I found a perfect bday card for you. It's hilarious. I should buy it, scanned and post it my blog as a bday shout out to you. : )

As for X-Mas, heck the department stores were already putting up their displays in August. What gets me are the Christmas candy that I see in the grocery stores. I just noticed marshmellow santas and snowmen. Do people really buy that stuff now, hold on to them or eat them, or does the store waste their money even purchasing them?

cruisin-mom said...

D.S.: no clue what who that is.

T.P.: I WILL NOT grin and BARE it!

Val: I don't blame you...I feel the same way.

Wishing: I shall never stop stuffing icecream down me.

E.K.: Well, I must admit, I love when the holiday music starts after thanksgiving...I love XMAS music.

Mia: it's true...once you hit 30, it's all weird! I think Brothers and Sisters may have gotten cancelled already, but I won't swear to it.

RCJ: I hear ya!

Cheated: Awww thanks...I'm POSITIVE i'm the hottest 51 year old my husband knows.

Shira: Oy...no sweaters...I haven't hit that stage yet!

S.T.: PLEASE show me that card...and yes, who eats marshmellow santas? lol

StepIma said...

Couldn't agree more... there's a store here that doesn't sell Halloween stuff, so they decided to put their trees up in mid-October - I wanted to scream!

Happy early birthday - you're only as old as you blog :)

Doctor Bean said...

Happy Birthday soon!

marallyn ben moshe said...

young you are just a spring chicken...enjoy every second the fifties are a hoot...flashing and all, a hoot...mazal tov...ahhhh christmas, one of the reasons i moved to jerusalem...when i sing oh little town of bethlehem it's just around the corner :))) again happy almost b'day...love your blog...stay safe

kasamba said...

As long as you're a hot babe, who cares how old you are??

Happy Birthday!

Jack's Shack said...

Happy birthday.

cruisin-mom said...

S.I.: You're only as old as you blog! LOL

Doc: why, thanks!

MBM: thanks!So far the 50's are good.

kasamba: you got that right :)

jack: Thanks:)

Sweettooth120 said...

Darn it, I can't remember where I saw it.

Happy Birthday Annie.

cruisin-mom said...

S.T.: "Happy Birthday Annie"...LOLOLOL