Saturday, February 24, 2007

reality

I couldn't be happier.

American Idol is back.

The Academy Awards are on tomorrow night...the best day of the year.

Britany Spears head slowed down Anna Nicole Smith news for five minutes.

Isn't life wonderful?

I went to a bar mitzvah today. Mr. Cruisin and I had the honor of performing an aliyah (called up to the torah to say a prayer before the young man reads his torah portion).

I have to say we weren't half bad. As we got back in our seats, my husband, being the great observer that he is, menitoned that going up to sing the aliyah is not unlike going before the judges on American Idol.

So, of course,upon returning to our seats, we sat in judgmental bliss over all the other contestants, ooops, I mean friends and family that were called up to say this prayer.

Just like American Idol, some were single contestants and some came forward in groups.

Mr. Cruisin: "hey you, contestant number 1...a bit pitchy, wouldn't you say?" "I'm just not feelin' you dawg, you know what I'm sayin'?"

Me: (elbowing Mr. Cruisin' in the gut) SHHHHH! Don't you know this is a serious religious ceremony...keep it down...besides...he wasn't bad. In fact, he had personality, a spark, he should keep going, and not give up".

Mr. Cruisin: "WHAT?! Are you kidding, (suddenly breaking into an English accent)that was just AWFUL! He should be ashamed, that was completely fuhget-table".

Next up was a group. NO choreography, no harmony, quite pitchy...hopeless.

How did any of these people expect to ever be invited to another audition, I mean, ceremony.

Oh well, all of life seems to have become just one big reality show.

Don't you think?

Gosh, I hope Mr. Cruisin isn't the father of Anna Nicole's baby.

13 comments:

Jewish Smörgåsbord said...

YOu guys are hilarious! SO, did you get a golden ticket, did you make it to Hollywood????

torontopearl said...

"I couldn't be happier.
American Idol is back."

I will put a twist on those words:

"We couldn't be happier.
Cruisin' Mom is back."

Enjoy your ice cream. Enjoy the Academy Awards.

And I hope you enjoyed your five minutes of spotlight fame yesterday on the bimah, and the spotlight you're still trying to milk with this post. :)

Ezzie said...

LOL - Welcome back, CM! :)

Sweettooth120 said...

LOL -

Ok, my time to vent - I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT ALAN ARKIN won for Best Supporting Actor. WHAT A SHAME and INSULT, especially to Djimon Hounsou. It was bad enough that Blood Diamond didn't get nominated, except for Leo's performance.

I can't wait to see some of the movies, I hadn't heard about, especially "West Bank Story" - how funny.

Sweettooth120 said...

Oh, and I forgot to add, I second TorontoPearl - yippee she's return.

Claire said...

Yay cruisin, good to have you back! And I'm also very very addicted to A.I. this season ~ I think it's gonna be a good one!

Cxx

Wendy said...

Love this! I admit we do critique the friends and relatives, as well... But it's more about how comfortable they look up there on the bimah!

Glad you're writing - I missed you!

marallyn ben moshe said...

hahahahahaha...i too am stuck watching american idol...but this time i got even...i now have bubbie chanah watching too...almost 84...she calls me...did you hear how bad they sing? ahhhhh sterophonic idol...ahhhhhh

Geologychick said...

That was an EXCELLENT post! I have been a lurker for quite a while - but I just had to comment because that was AWESOME!!!!

Val said...

And right now, the guy upstairs is looking down and shaking his head at your audacity, your chutzpah, your... sheer BRILLIANCE! :) I mean, you're his creation, no?!!

Great post. I'm sure the next time I see someone heading to the bima, I'm gonna be smirking! ;)

cruisin-mom said...

j.s.: of course we got the golden ticket!

t.p.: thanks :)...and, you know me well...ice cream and the awards...a perfect match.

Ezzie: thanks!

S.T.: yes, that Westbank movie looks great.

Claire: I'm addicted every season!

Wendy: thanks...I have missed being here.

MBM: I love it...bubbe chana could probably put Simon in his place!

G.C.: welcome...don't be a lurky any longer, I love comments (but don't tell anyone)

Val: wow, what a compliment, thanks! Yep, you'll never look at anyone the same now. (sorry)

Sweettooth120 said...

Oh, CM, I just had to share this with you. It seems that its not only your hubby that is hooked on AI and adding his two cents.

My husband is totally hooked now, AND, cracked me up tonight. He said, "I don't think that turtleneck looks good on Ryan. Now if he wore a crew neck, then it probably would work."

You have to know my husband to understand that I would never in my life ever imagine THAT comment coming out of his mouth.

cruisin-mom said...

S.T.: tell your husband I'm proud of him!!!